Alright, now that you've had the chance to digest the first half of the top ten countdown, let's continue down through the bottom half. What's with that picture, by the way? I have no idea. Just thought it looked cool. Anyway, here's the rest of the Top Ten Entertainment Moments of 2004:
5. Sox Win! Sox Win! - The 2004 World Series transcends the world of sports, as the Boston Red Sox finally break the Curse of the Bambino. Even non-sports fans knew of the futility of the Red Sox and were drawn to watching the hapless ones overcome a 3-0 deficit versus their arch-rivals, the New York Yankees. From there it was a foregone conclusion as they swept the St. Louis Cardinals to capture their first championship in 84 years. The good? Seeing the city of Boston rejoice, as the chip was finally hoisted off their shoulders. The bad? All of the friggin' celebrities who suddenly started sporting Red Sox caps like they knew it would happen all along. The absolutely unforgivable? Jimmy Fallon and Drew Barrymore running onto the field to film a screen kiss for their movie Fever Pitch, thus spoiling a momentous occasion for all Sox fans. Fallon, you screwed up every SNL sketch you were in with your idiotic giggling and inability to keep a straight face. Did you have to screw this moment up too? Geez. Despite this sour note, the victory was still one of the most entertaining of the year, landing it in the top five for 2004.
4. Election 2004 - It was the most hotly contested Presidential election, since, well... the last election we had in 2000. Because of this, the entertainment world felt that they had to throw their two cents in this time and see if they could sway the 2004 Election in their favor. Thus, the return of the propaganda film in the form of Fahrenheit 9/11. Fahrenheit 9/11 became the highest grossing documentary of all time, focusing on the scandals and shortcomings of good ol' Dubya, helping to achieve a resounding victory for John Kerry. What's that you say? John Kerry lost? But didn't Tim Robbins, Susan Sarandon, and Sean Penn also put their celebrity cred on the line in the push to evict Bush? Yes, you say? And yet they failed too? Hmmm... what's that say about America when our finest movie actors and directors can't even win a damn election? The next thing you'll be telling me is Julia Roberts won't be able to bring stability to Iraq simply with the sound of her charming yet boisterous laugh.
3. Religion as Entertainment - Mel Gibson's epic film, The Passion of the Christ rules the box office, despite critics' claims that Mel was loonier than Anne Heche for even attempting to make this movie. The Passion was released amid controversy that it was anti-semitic and way too violent, but people still came in droves and walked away awed and moved. The movie even spurred numerous television shows and specials about Jesus, further illustrating what an impact it had on the entertainment world. Mel went from Hollywood pariah to entertainment mogul with one of the riskiest movie choices in recent memory. For sticking to his faith, taking a chance, and ultimately proving the critics wrong, Mel Gibson makes the Top Ten for 2004.
2. She's Not a Girl, Not Yet a Twice Divorced Woman - Britney Spears gets married! Um... to the guy who played George in Seinfeld? Oh no, some other dude named Jason Alexander. Oh. Alright. Wait, the marriage was annulled? Oh. Great! Back on the market, alright Brit! What's that? She's now engaged to some dude who fathered two children with a bit part actress on Moesha? In fact, they're now married? Now that's where I draw the line. Come on, you're telling me this is the best she could do? Britney Spears? I remember a time when she could have had pretty much any guy she wanted. Now I can't imagine anyone going near her with a ten foot pole when she gets divorced. And believe me, she will be divorced soon enough. Maybe she's some sort of modern day Cinderella, the clock struck midnight, and her mansion turned back into a trailer park. All I can say is someone find that damn glass slipper, STAT!
1. Answer... Ken Jennings - Question... Who is the most amazing Jeopardy contestant of all time? 74 straight wins, $2.5 million in prize money, Ken Jennings was a frickin' machine. And it's not just the fact that he won, it was how he won. Ken ripped the Jeopardy mic like a vandal, lit up the stage and waxed the other chumps like candles. It was amazing. The score heading into Final Jeopardy was usually something like KJ - $15k, next closet competitor - $2k, last place and proud owner of the Jeopardy travel edition as a parting gift - Negative $5k. Every episode. This must have been what it was like to see Michael Jordan in his prime. Just unstoppable and far and away the best player every to play the game. Even his opponents treated him like he was a deity, just happy to be in his presence and answer a couple of questions before being sent back to obscurity. And then the unthinkable happened. The mighty KJ was taken out by answering "Fed-Ex" when the world so obviously knew "H&R Block" was correct. Just like that, the mighty warrior had fallen. Like seeing an aging Babe Ruth or Hank Aaron struggle to play in their golden years, the defeated Ken Jennings suddenly looked smaller and more meek. However, no one will ever forget the most amazing run in TV game show history. The NUMBER ONE entertainment moment of 2004.
Disagree with this list? Have some others that I've missed? Add your comments below, people, and let the world know...
2 comments:
Was the Carl's Jr Double Pastrami Burger introduced in 2004? I would've put that at least in the Top 5.
Otherwise, Ebert & Roeper surprisingly gave "Fever Pitch" two enthusiastic thumbs up. Perhaps Fallon is not the box office poison that so many people were anticipating. -BK
One important event you left out is the movie Sideways. The first in it class! Sideways was a chick flick for 30 something ex day trader turned mini real estate tycoons who have nothing better to do with their time and money than complain about merlot and cheat on their wives. This movie was the most amazing piece of trast I've ever forced myself to watch. Everybody praises Paul Giamitti's performance in it. I guess you'd like it if you want to see a middle aged man whine and cry like a little schoolgirl who dropped her science fair project in a puddle. Seriously, you must watch this movie so you can understand the lowest bar from which to judge every movie in existence.
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